Amazon announced on Friday it was buying high-end grocery chain Whole Foods, and the internet is having a field day.
Jokes abound over the grocer’s high prices, Amazon CEO Jeff Bezos’ net worth ($84.8 billion, making him the third-richest person on the planet), and the fact that on Thursday, Bezos solicited Twitter for ideas on how to spend his money.
Amazon is paying $42 a share in an all-cash deal, valuing Whole Foods at $13.7 billion and making it the ecommerce giant’s largest acquisition to date.
Here are some of the best jokes about the deal:
AMAZON, 1998: hello we sell books but online
AMAZON, 2023: please return to your Primehouse for your nightly Primemeal, valued Primecitizen
— KRANG T. NELSON (@KrangTNelson) June 16, 2017
Jeff Bezos: “Alexa, buy me something from Whole Foods.”
Alexa: “Sure, Jeff. Buying Whole Foods now.”
Jeff Bezos: “WHA- ahh go ahead.” pic.twitter.com/GuJ2jlAiuU
— JESAL (@JesalTV) June 16, 2017
Amazon buys Whole Foods for 13.7 billion, roughly equivalent to 11 shopping bags of their organic berries.
— Warren Leight (@warrenleightTV) June 16, 2017
*checking out at Whole Foods*
“See cashier put a Fire Phone in my bag.”
“Hey what’s that, I didn’t buy that.”
— SwiftOnSecurity (@SwiftOnSecurity) June 16, 2017
I gave Whole Foods $13.7 billion for five lemons and a half-pound of almonds. #hereallweek
— (((Josh))) (@Tyrangiel) June 16, 2017
Whole Foods Brass: Our grocery store is not for sale!!
Amazon: We’ll give you $13.7 billion dollars.
Whole Foods: pic.twitter.com/JmQ8Mkp3bM
— Scott Hackman (@ScottInSacto) June 16, 2017
Bezos: I need a suggestion for my money
Crowd: Pay your workers more
Bezos: I heard “Buy Whole Foods”
— Leonard Pierce (@leonardpierce) June 16, 2017
Rare live look at Jeff Bezos in his office. “Alexa, play Jay Z- takeover” pic.twitter.com/eE0QwoeFYt
— T.L.O.Eyvan (@SavantStreeter) June 16, 2017
Me, an idiot, not a billionaire: I bought something from Whole Foods
Jeff Bezos, a genuis, a billionaire: Why didn’t you buy Whole Foods?
— Margarita Noriega (@margarita) June 16, 2017
— emily bell (@emilybell) June 16, 2017